Where do I even begin? In every single way this post is my fault. Warning to anyone who dares to read: this may cause irritation from my obsessive venting about self created problems. In life there are two main ways we forget our selves to please others. It just so happens that one way is absolutely amazing and good (although extremely stressful). And the second is tragic.
Way number one: Always helping others no matter your situation.
This one is the good one. In ways we receive more blessings while we are struggling to get by, and still helping others. As stressful as it may be to have an empty tank of gas, or no time to do homework, just being a student overall, it always makes you feel just the slightest bit better to help someon in need. Sometimes it can be difficult though, because it's so hard to help EVERYONE! As badly as I want to just let everyone who is in pain feel better, and those who feel lonely to know they aren't alone, and those who feel unloved feel loved, I just can't. And it breaks every muscle bone and tissue of my body. It is the saddest thing in the world that I can't do everything for everyone. I wish more than anything that I could. I wish I wish I wish. If anyone has figured out how to do it, please tell me your secret! If you have ever felt like I wasn't there for you or like I just didn't care, I'm sorry!!!! I'm trying so hard to be there for you an focus on you, but it's extremely difficult when there are five other voices asking me something else. I'm sorry. I'm really trying. I'll talk about the second way tomorrow cause I'm sure you are all receiving brain hemorrhages from reading this, and it's just to much for me to think about this late. Goodnight I love you, remember who you are, I'll try and do everything I can for you, if I dot live up to expectations, please forgive me. I am only human.
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